This week is the 4 year anniversary of when Chason and I met face to face for the first time on my 22nd birthday after months of letters, texts and 7 hour phone calls. So in honor of that I thought it would be a good time to write about my experience with dating sites over the years and how I met my husband.
It all started at show in Dallas.
Rock and Worship road show in ’09 was the place I received my first flyer for a Christian dating site that would later lead me to join said site, join every other one out there and eventually meet the man I now call my husband. This is a little about that journey and all the crazy that is the online dating experience.
When my sister, cousin and I all got the flyer while in line for a show on that spring TX day we thought it would be just amusing enough to join. And if you know us you know that we will do a lot just for our own amusement. My cousin joined first and my sister and I followed. It was weird but hey, I was single and living in a small town…what other options did I have?
I talked to a dude and he drove to my house. He arrived at midnight and was greeted only by me and my sister…my father was asleep in the other room and mom was out-of-state. I mention this because I would advise others to not do this. Thankfully this dude was just a just a normal 23-year-old dud and not an ax murder so I was safe, but as a rule of thumb always meet either in a public place or have more than just your sister right with you.
That experience was…interesting…to say the least and I vowed to never try online dating again. Why? Well because I found that with the town I lived in any relationship I was going to get from a dating site would be long distance and that failed miserably because well, 20 something guys just don’t have what it takes for that.
Flash forward to some months later I was back in the dating site world. And by back I mean I was on every one of them. eHarmony? Yep. Match.com? Sadly, yes. Christian Mingle? You bet! All the ones you see commercials for my picture and quirky bio was there.
I found eHarmony to be nice. I never paid though because I was poor but the free version was enough for a bit. Found a couple nice dudes but none i clicked with. Mostly i felt they matched me with the most boring men out there. Christian, but boring and not at all my type.
Match.com…oh my, the worst! All my matches were town/close to town guys, which wouldn’t have been so bad if they didn’t have their pants down to their knees and listened to ghetto music (yes i judged the guys by the music they listed…which is how I judge all people).
JC Match was the very first one I ever joined so I feel I should mention them. I don’t think they are even running anymore so we will just leave it at that.
Now we are to Christian Mingle…oh Christian Mingle, the surprise of my life. I was on there for a few months and not much luck until one day in late February 2011. I got a “smile” from a Chason Arthur (Christian Mingle has this thing were you can send smilies to the person you’re interested in before writing them). I clicked his profile and saw a dashing handsome face with the most charming smile I had ever seen (and really nice arms I might add ;). He was from Georgia and looked like the perfect southern man. I waned to kitty pounce hug him. So I sent him a “smile” back.
(our profile pictures that we each had up)
Then followed a week or so of fun questions sent back and forth between us. The questions were fun and lighthearted like “Where would you take your dream vacation?” and stuff like that. Just like eHarmony I wasn’t a paying member so I couldn’t write or see messages I could only “smile” and send questions. Thankfully for me Chason is a clever one and got my little profile picture hint that led him to my Facebook…ladies and gents, this really works! Dating sites won’t allow you to put any social media links in your profile but you can get around it by splitting up the link in your picture captions ;)
On March 11th 2011 we sent our very first letter to each other via Facebook. That letter was followed by many, many others along with many texts and long phone calls. He ended up moving down to Austin to intern at The Austin Stone so we then decided to meet in person on my 22nd birthday.
When the day arrived that Chason was to come to my home the air conditioning broke in my house which led to me doing my makeup while sweating lol. Go figure. But I eventually did get my self together and I texted Chason to head on over from the b&b he was staying at in my town (actually I said “get over here before I jump out of my skin from nervousness” lol). I will forever remember watching him through my window walking nervously to my door, hands in the pockets of his ripped jeans. After a few minutes of waiting he texted me that my door bell was broken lol. I opened it up and saw the sweet face of the man I had fallen in love with through letters and phone calls.
We chatted awkwardly for few and then headed to a little restaurant for lunch followed by a visit to the bookstore and then a walk at the bay where we held hands for the first time. And as he held me in his arms there by the water I knew I was home.
That was such a perfect, lovely, special day. And as hugged him goodnight at 1am after watching movies on my parents couch I couldn’t believe I found my husband to be on the Internet :) Yeah it’s safe to say that Christian Mingle was a hit and pretty much made my life awesome.
So to any single people out there that are thinking of trying out the online dating world or maybe have tried it but haven’t had much luck, to you I say just keep casting your net. Maybe you won’t find your special one on the web…but maybe, just maybe you will. And that possibility is too exciting to pass by. Be patient and be cautious, use good judgment. But keep your heart and mind open, you never know just when God will surprise you.