Burn It Down And Walk Away

I haven’t been in the blogging world much (like not at all) this year and even though i have a ton of work and clients are impatient i am finding myself in a need to write mood today so here goes…

At the end of every year i write a blog going over some of the highlights and low points in that particular year…not so much for others to know but for me to remember. 2016 has been split down the middle for us…half of the year was amazing…the other half…well, it’s been pretty dang tough.

So this leaves me in a weird place….

In early-mid 2016  we were able to travel and have many great family memories. From Cabo in January to the British Isle in May – both incredible, wonderful experiences to see the world…i cant put into words what seeing England, Scotland, Ireland and Pairs was like for me….it was beautiful.

Aaaaand because life really is all about peaks and mountains life took a very tough turn after that.

Work became filled with more stress than usual….and while i can’t go into details here, it was a battle. People you trusted became people who you wish you’d never met. There were long, long days and nights of work and rebuilding. It was a lot.

In that though (#brightside #blessings ;p ) other relationships were strengthened and i have come even more love the people who we work with/our friends who have our backs….they are family ❤

But life has been tough, things that i thought would, in mind, be perfect ended well, not so much. I’m in  a place of exhaustion, wanting, impatience….and some brat in there too lol.

I am looking forward to a new year…i don’t think it will mean the same to me as every other New Year’s Eve in the past but more a somber day…

I want to let this year go…i want to let my heavy heart go. I want to believe that on midnight i can begin again (like i always used to believe ).

But alas, life grows us and our hearts in both good and bad ways. And i choose to be happy about that.

I choose to let this heavy heart/heavy year have an ending. With the pop of the champagne bottle and some tears, smiles and laughs i choose to let it end.

To let the hope flow in, to toast to a new year with new possibilities…through the tears i will toast.

I will raise my glass to lessons learned…lessons on how to trust my God and my husband and self. Lessons on how  i fail but God picks me up. Lessons on grace and how much i truly need it.

I will clink my glass with my love on midnight, kiss him and thank God that we are still here – that every breath is a second chance. A chance to believe, a chance to learn and a chance to experience the love and grace of God.

So my dear ones, here is to us – the ones that don’t have it all together, the ones who hurt, the ones who struggle with anxiety and depression, and the ones who are just longing for their home.  We are all just passing through this crazy world. So i raise my glass to you, to me and to this crazy,wonderful, stressful year. Let’s let it end, let’s let it die. Let’s take the lessons, light it up, pour the champagne (or sparkling grape juice – whatever you prefer) and burn it down and walk away.

Making room for new.


“He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” – Rev 21:5